After an epic struggle that spanned time and history, Taylor Swift enacted swift (well, not so swift, but her last name is Swift so everyone’s doing that so I am too) justice on her alleged DJ molester. She won her case and her dollar and now, everything’s right with the world. That extra dollar now makes Taylor Swift the richest self-satisfied starlet (is she still young enough to be a starlet) on the planet. Bra. Vo. Slow, sarcastic claps only.
A Denver jury sided with Taylor Swift and determined her allegations that ex-radio DJ David Mueller groped her at a meet-and-greet four years ago are valid — concluding a contentious, and highly publicized, trial and requiring Mueller to pay out a symbolic $1 to the pop star.
“I want to thank Judge William J. Martinez and the jury for their careful consideration, my attorneys Doug Baldridge, Danielle Foley, Jay Schaudies and Katie Wright for fighting for me and anyone who feels silenced by a sexual assault, and especially anyone who offered their support throughout this four-year ordeal and two-year long trial process,” Swift said in a statement.
“I acknowledge the privilege that I benefit from in life, in society and in my ability to shoulder the enormous cost of defending myself in a trial like this. My hope is to help those whose voices should also be heard. Therefore, I will be making donations in the near future to multiple organizations that help sexual assault victims defend themselves.”